im hurting.

out of the blue.
after having not fallen for a long time
i fell down TWICE today.

TWICE.

who the heck falls twice in a day.
the first one was while running down the travellator.
you know how stupid i felt.

the second one was because the floor was wet.
and i slipped and fell flat on the right side of my face/head.
it was throbbing after that.
the left side of my jaw now hurts when i open my mouth,
my right cheek is turning black/purple.
my head is throbbing and is aching.
not to mention that my knees are scraped.

the pain is one thing. but the embarrassment is a whole other level.
i dont really care about that cause i know if they really are my friends,
they wont laugh because of that

which brings me to another reason why im hurting.
the people that i was so close to beginning this year.
they feel so distant.
i dont even tell them anything anymore.
and it seems im their topic of discussion.

you know how painful i feel?

too bad there isnt a doctor for heart pains.
or one that could immediately relieve you of your pains.
but there is a God.
and im sorry i havent been talking to you much God.
i guess my fall is a huge wake up call.
to make me realise that without you i cant walk.
and without you in my heart, pride will overtake.
this fall really humbled me and showed me how much i need to rely on you. but Jesus, im hurting.
make it go away. 6:06 PM